It’s been over a month since I last posted. Since then I’ve turned 25, Christmas and New Years came and went, I left my job, moved to Cleveland, started my new job, and celebrated a whole year together with V.

Wow.

Lots of things.

But what’s prompted me to post today isn’t related to any of those things.

You know how the downward spiral of the internet works, so I won’t explain how I randomly started watching Sia perform Chandelier live (with Maddie Ziegler dancing, of course). But as I watched them both consistently perform the song on Dancing With the Stars and Ellen it reminded me how beautiful the choreography and lyrics to that song are. Coupled together and they just………I don’t even know.

I particularly love these lyrics:

I’m holding on for dear life. Won’t look down, won’t open my eyes.
Keep my glass full until morning light, ’cause I’m just holding on for tonight.

Haven’t you ever felt that way? I definitely know there were a few times last year where I was just barely holding on. And sometimes (maybe I’m actually mental) I have these nights where I can’t sleep but I can’t do anything so literally for hours I just lay (or sit) in bed and stare. I can’t read or watch videos or do laundry or anything productive. Plus I live alone so it’s extremely isolating and I start to go mad. I start to think up insane things.

Which is why I like the Sia video so much. I’m not one for interpretative dance so much but I really connect with that video because I know what it feels like to want to claw at the walls and throw yourself to the floor.

So anyway, I saw the video again today and felt compelled to share it again:

I hope everyone is having a fun, safe, and great 2015 so far.